Horrible Hooters: The 10 Worst Celebrity Boob Jobs to Make You Puke

Men love boobs. Big, giant, jiggly boobs.

Women will go to great lengths to enhance their tatas, especially in the celebrity world where it seems sex appeal is far more important than actual talent.

Unfortunately, plastic surgery doesn’t always go as planned…no matter how much money you have. And in some cases, there’s no reversing the damage done by a scalpel-wielding surgeon hell-bent on stuffing you with silicone.

You’ve got the veiny ones, the spaced-too-far-apart ones, and the god awful scarred up underboob we’ve seen on so many dirty, dirty porn stars.

The moral of the story? Sometimes it’s just better to be happy with what you have, ladies.

Still, it’s fun to laugh. So here’s our rundown of the fake and freaky, weirdest and worst celebrity boob jobs ever.

Tori Spelling

Tori Spelling’s left tidday began to sink over time causing a weird dent at the top. It was a result of getting larger implants which are known to descend, as well as having kids and gaining/losing weight. She had to go in again to get it fixed up, but it’s still a bit weird lookin’ in 2012. I’d still hit it, though.

Vivica A. Fox

This is one hot cougar, but if you looked closely in 2006 you’d notice her right boob showing clear signs of crooked awkwardness. I’d still hit it, though.

Victoria Beckham

Round and hard-looking. That’s the best way to describe Victoria Beckham’s original boob job before taking ‘em down a cup size or two and fixin’ ‘em up to look a little less weird. I’d still hit it, though.

Christina Aguilera

When Christina Aguilera first came out, she was hot. But not hot or slutty enough, according to Hollywood. So it didn’t take her long to go out and get her jugs filled, leaving her with a nasty armpit scar. The armpit is one of four incision sites commonly used in breast augmentation as well as the nipple, the underboob and the belly button. I’d still hit it, though.

Katie Price

Katie Price got a big set of bazookas installed before coming to her senses and realizing they were simply huge. She went back to the chop shop to get them reduced in 2007, then worked on again in 2008. I’d still hit it, though.

Jewel

In 2007, singer Jewel had a couple of lop-sideys that she displayed at the Country Music Association Awards leading some plastic surgeons to believe she got implants that were too small and poorly placed. I’d still hit it, though.

Alicia Douvall

When speaking of English model and reality TV star Alicia Douvall’s bad boob job, the question is which one? Damn girl has had 16 of ‘em for god’s sake. I’d still hit it, though.

Paula Abdul

This former pop star and American Idol judge had a low-light in her career a few years back, which included a bunch of sketched-out TV appearances and erratic behaviour on her show Hey Paula. She also had some weird-looking boobs for a bit before she got ‘em fixed up again. I’d get in a time machine and hit it, though.

Courtney Love

Poor girl became a mishmash of bad plastic surgery a few years ago, but she’s looking a bit better these days after god only knows how many revisits to the doc. This was her at her very worst for sure. I’d still…Hell no.

Donatella Versace

This pic is just too gross to post. We won’t even do that to you. If you haven’t seen it and really want to find out, Google it. If not, just imagine something like this with boobs. I don’t even want to think about it.

Pete Richards
Author
Pete Richards

If Star Wars and Van Damme had a baby, it would be me.